Parenthood
As much as I'd like to think I'm as funny as the Steve Martin movie, alas I am not. A few things have come to mind, though, in the last few days.
When you're 14 you think that you can wake up, get dressed, take the dog out, eat breakfast, and bundle up for the Wisconsin winter weather......all in 15 minutes. No matter what either of your parents say, that's the way it is. Now, this is a major frustration for the parents. And for the poor doggy waiting to relieve herself. If the young woman in question is trying to help her family members develop patience, it's not working. How to get that into her hard head is quite impossible, though. This whole situation is made worse by a little thing called a lock that is on her bedroom door. The parents cannot enter her bedroom to entice her out of her bed with things like ice cold water. All we can do is stand outside and pound on the door. One of these days, my hope is that the teenager will have a child exactly like her.
When you're ten you think that everything is a joke. A snowball thrown at the back of a parent's head, for example. Or tormenting the family pet with a battery operated robot. Or tormenting a sister with endless questions about the world around him. When you tell the child that these things are not funny, he doesn't believe you and stomps off to his room in disgust because "he was only joking." One of these days, my hope is that he will have a child who does the same things.
When you're 39 and a father, you think that teasing the children is okay. You think it's okay to tease the daughter about the boy who called the other night. You think it's okay to start rough housing with the son. The problem comes, though, when one of the children gets hurt, whether emotionally or physically. Is it so hard for you to apologize? One of these days, my hope is that he will see the boundaries that each child has around him/her and honor those boundaries.
When you're 41 and a mother you constantly find yourself in two worlds. One where the children are still young and you want to control everything from what they eat and wear to who their friends are and how much time they spend away from the home. The other where you are proud of your children's maturity and independance. Your heart swells when you hear your daughter giving advice to a friend about how to deal with peer pressure. You are so proud when your son defends an outcast at school and somehow finds a way for the other child to be accepted, however briefly, into his group of friends. I cherish both worlds.
One of these days, though, I hope to be more comfortable in the second one.
When you're 14 you think that you can wake up, get dressed, take the dog out, eat breakfast, and bundle up for the Wisconsin winter weather......all in 15 minutes. No matter what either of your parents say, that's the way it is. Now, this is a major frustration for the parents. And for the poor doggy waiting to relieve herself. If the young woman in question is trying to help her family members develop patience, it's not working. How to get that into her hard head is quite impossible, though. This whole situation is made worse by a little thing called a lock that is on her bedroom door. The parents cannot enter her bedroom to entice her out of her bed with things like ice cold water. All we can do is stand outside and pound on the door. One of these days, my hope is that the teenager will have a child exactly like her.
When you're ten you think that everything is a joke. A snowball thrown at the back of a parent's head, for example. Or tormenting the family pet with a battery operated robot. Or tormenting a sister with endless questions about the world around him. When you tell the child that these things are not funny, he doesn't believe you and stomps off to his room in disgust because "he was only joking." One of these days, my hope is that he will have a child who does the same things.
When you're 39 and a father, you think that teasing the children is okay. You think it's okay to tease the daughter about the boy who called the other night. You think it's okay to start rough housing with the son. The problem comes, though, when one of the children gets hurt, whether emotionally or physically. Is it so hard for you to apologize? One of these days, my hope is that he will see the boundaries that each child has around him/her and honor those boundaries.
When you're 41 and a mother you constantly find yourself in two worlds. One where the children are still young and you want to control everything from what they eat and wear to who their friends are and how much time they spend away from the home. The other where you are proud of your children's maturity and independance. Your heart swells when you hear your daughter giving advice to a friend about how to deal with peer pressure. You are so proud when your son defends an outcast at school and somehow finds a way for the other child to be accepted, however briefly, into his group of friends. I cherish both worlds.
One of these days, though, I hope to be more comfortable in the second one.
posted by Laurie at 9:22 AM
2 Comments:
My mother always told my younger sister that she hoped she would have a daughter just like her.
My sister is remembering that curse right now. And I remain grateful that I just had pups.
Hang in there. Only the rest of your life to go...
:D
One of these days, though, I hope to be more comfortable in the second one.
You and me both.
Post a Comment
<< Home